Sunday, April 18, 2010
Hey . Ok .. seriously . I need to explain something .. I posted something crappy earlier today & now I feel like an ass . The post entitled 'I don't know what love is' is totally unusual for me to write about .. HAHAHHA .. Ok , I was having a low blood sugar at the moment because I hadn't eat sugary products more than 24 hours . It made my head a little woozy & u could pretty much say I was being a straight-forward lunatic . LOL . But it's not a lie . I don't lie about things like that . But still, I feel like an ass . Hahahaha . Anyway , I've just spend hours baking a cake just now .. I tasted it . Not so bad . Not that good either though . I put too much flour resulting it to taste like an incy wincy bit of flour . So it's kind of distasteful . I'm not really good in baking but I love doing it . I think I can bake cookies better than cakes . However, I think I did a pretty good job on the frosting though [I think] . A mixture of icing sugar, Chocolate 'emulco' & cocoa powder . Plus, I did add just the right amount of castor sugar into the mixture of cake . I learned to bake patisseries from the show on channel 707 called 'Rachel Allen Bake !' and channel 703 which is the AFC channel . Apart from that, I've written new lyrics this evening . Not just lyrics , but it's a complete song ! It has been a LONG time since I can come up with a melody to go along with the lyrics I've written so far . Better yet, I remember the melody .. I always forget but this time I didn't . Thank you memory .. ! It's an icky yucky lame love song really . I was fantasizing about something that doesn't exist .. but when inspiration hits , u can't just let it go away .. such a waste if u do that .. I couldn't find any papers or pen so I used a brown envelope & a black colour pencil. LOL . So I guess , that's it for today .. I have nothing else to say . In addition, I am sleepy so it would be better if I sleep now so I could wake up early tomorrow . Loads of assignments to finish . UGH . UGH . UGH . Goodnight ![or good morning] =)
Labels: At Tha Moment
Saturday, April 17, 2010
What is love ? I'm talking about love for the special one in our lives ? Can anyone tell what does it mean without looking up a dictionary ? Define Love to me .. In what form does it exist .. what does it feel like .. But most importantly , how can you know it will stay forever and won't leave you hanging like a picture on the wall in the end ? An optimist person would say that it's the most significant piece of the heart and that you would never survive without it . But as for the pessimist, they will tell you that love's a surreal fantasy created by the minds of people as an escape from the realistic world and that love is a waste of time. Could I judge these two different personalities of human based on what they say about love ? I don't know .. But do u want to know what I think ? Love is something that I am scared of .. or maybe I'm even terrified .. why ? I don't have love experiences to match with the words I speak of love .. so I really don't know .. All that I know is , I'm secretly terrified to let anyone in. Inside my heart.. Let's call it , .. insecurity .. I'm quick to think of the worst but I think I'm inevitably sure about one thing . That love fades as time flies , thus , it leaves u in the end feeling lonely and sorrow creeps into u like a ghost possesses a little girl . Call me a non-believer , I'll just sigh . I've seen so many people die of love, cry because of love .. I'm not one of those people . I never really had the chance to be in love .. I have no experience to be exact . I had a couple of boyfriends in the past but they were not love . I wasn't in love .. I was just experimenting although I didn't realize it back then because I was too young. I am young , still.. but I know better now . I learned from other people . You know, when two people are in love, they would always say to each other things like 'I can't live without you' , 'You're the only person that I want to spend the rest of my life with' and all but isn't it funny that when those two people break up, they would just simply move on with their lives .. They still can live without each other although the process of grieving and forgetting each other was difficult , they manage to move on . They'll find someone new . So .. the words that they tell each other , are they lies ? . Seems to me that those people aren't really in love with each other as they think they are . What's the deal with love ? Why must we find someone we would share our lives with ? Can't we just be alone and feel perfectly fine and happy without love ? Why should women have husbands and men have wives ? I couldn't tell u why because I don't know . But who am I to say that we don't need love too right ? So I am sort of in both ways .. I am an optimist but I am also a pessimist in love . Secretly, I want to be in love but my pessimist side keeps me from letting people in . I guess I have this whole dark and huge ego . And I am waiting for that one person to break it . To teach me to build bridges instead of walls . Make me love the sun more than I love the rain . What I'm trying to say is .. people have their own views and rights .. People have minds and hearts . So whatever thoughts we have about love , they would all change when we find someone that we could honestly be in love with . But ask ourselves when we find the one, 'would this person loves me for me? Not for the way I look and what I have and accept my countless flaws ?' .. Being in love with someone means that u are able to get through the thick and thin with the same person everytime. To wake up and still have the same feeling towards the very same person . Well that's my point of view . That's the way I honestly think of love . As for now, I'm just a young girl living life as it is with a camouflage to hide my love ego. Lastly, all that I can say is, I really don't know what love is . =)
Labels: Mind Heart Soul
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